Blogs

Nov
12
A Story About Dignity

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This is a story about Maintaining One's Dignity. It's a good story especially for young women who struggle in a Man's World to maintain, Dignity.

My daughter worked at a Gym & Health Spa. One of those boujee ones that I cannot afford. I always say, you never know where your kids will end up. Always a great athelete and ranked nationally, my daughter ended up getting certified in Life Guarding. From there it was Swimming Instructor & Personal Trainer. At the tender age of 21, she has learned the hard way about working in a Man's World as well as having to deal with a Female Boss. I never recommend the second one. For some reason, a lot of female bosses have it in for the women that work under them, especially if they are attractive and don't kiss ass. This was the problem with my daughter. You could say, she is a chip off the old block. Being she had worked poolside the longest, you'd think she'd be promoted to Pool Coordinator. Nope, first she was overlooked and a fellow with barely 6 months experience there was given the title. He was a great Shoe Shine Boy. There were no formal interviews. He was chosen behind closed doors and the announcement made. Disgusted, my daugter decided to Stay On. I was surprised. I would have quit that day. Anyway, this New Coordinator quit once he found a new job within two months. Now the Female Boss asked my daughter to help her with the duties. She did. I don't know why. Since she was not offered the job like Shoe Shine Boy. After voluntarily helping out for a few weeks, my daughter was told, if she wanted the job she would have to apply. She did. She was interviewed by the GM who is best friends with Female Boss. He had already overlooked my daughter for Personal Trainer, twice. No Reason Given, yet she had the Credentials & Time Invested. I told my daughter, it is unfortunate, but having a Female Boss who is Insecure and Loves to Gossip could cause Problems. To have a male GM listen to that Junk told me we were honestly dealing with 2 Insecure Women. Kudos to my daughter, she continued to work there. Now up for the Coordinator's job again, she interviewed in July. She bought a new suit, make up and slam dunked the interview with both bosses, or so we thought. Still, no response. Not even an email. Did I state she worked there for 2 years? The last coordinator was hired within 3 days of employment and no formal interview. My 21 year old had to chase down the 2 adults to get answers, how professional. Now she was told they had to post the job online for 2 weeks. Now it was August. My daughter watched as an outside candidate was interviewed and then he declined the job. On the final day of the 2 week posting, my daughter had to chase down her interesting Female Boss to find out that there would be a group interview with 2 other candidates. One was from outside the club. The other, was a newly hired Shoe Shiner. My daugher yet again, answered those asinine questions about what makes a good Life Guard, courage, compassion, etc., I would have walked out of that interview. My poor daughter was told she would have an answer by 9am the next day. By 11 am, she was finally told by Scorpio Female Boss, she did not get the job yet again. She never heard from the GM, not even an email or word of encouragement. Devastated, she still showed up for work. I shook my head and sat her down.

I told my daughter she was more mature about things than the people she worked for. I told her how unfortunately, her Female Boss made it impossible for her to get ahead there. That she had given it enough tries. I am a firm believer in the 3 strikes you're out rule. She had made 4 attempts. These people were never going to promote her for whatever reasons. I told her to start looking. That I honestly would have quit without any notice after they strung her along all summer. I know because I was the only one dealing with this matter at home! Shelling out money for interview suits and reading Tarot cards almost daily about the outcome. I complimented her that she wanted to stay until she found something. I felt that the environment there was so unprofessional I did not want her working there another minute.

Spirit works in mysterious ways, especially at night. I am a firm believer in this approach. Have an issue, ask the Universe and go to sleep. By morning, the answer will be there. You may not necessarily dream of the situation, I never do, but I just wake up knowing what I have to do. Your angels, ancestors, master teachers, whatever you want to call them, the best time to reach you is during sleep. The next day, my daughter showed she had my DNA in her. She was like, Screw This, I'm not giving notice. I'm going in there today and quitting. I said, Thank You! At 21, if you can keep your self worth and dignity intact against 2 ridiculous grown ass bosses now, you have learned a valuable lesson that will help you throughout your Life. I know for a fact, I learned this lesson much later on in Life. Some jobs are not worth the aggravation. Some doors will not open, they are obviously not your door. I was a little nervous being I am the sole provider, but at this point, I had no problem agreeing with her plans. She Quit.

First, every remnant of that job was removed from the house. That's telling the Universe, you're ready for new. I counted almost 20 red life guard shirts. I made my daughter walk them outside to the garbage. Don't keep things like that for oil rags, etc. OUT! Membership cards, ID card, Christmas staff photo, everything went out. We made a list of all the clubs that had indoor pools and she started inquiring. She had her heart set on one club and within a week of quitting, she was hired there! Talk about Making Things Manifest! Better pay, and they would work with her school schedule. When the Universe closes a door, it always opens a window. I am so proud of my daughter that she up and quit. I guess most parents would say that was unprofessional, but it was obvious to me, that she needed to keep her, DIGNITY. You DO NOT treat employees like that. I even told my daughter, that I was shocked the GM did not call her in and say, it was close, keep it up, there's a place for you. He just scurried away. I still shake my head today, because my daughter was the adult and the managers, the children. My daughter's exit has been the talk of the boojee gym. She has had several colleagues and members contact her, friend her on FaceBook and offer her opportunities. What gym members do you know contact their Life Guard? I told my daughter, you don't let people you work for, treat you like that, somethings are more important than a paycheck. At my daughter's new job, Michael Phelps showed up the first day. Talk about signs. Within 2 months, they already have spoken to her about taking over swimming lessons and mention of promotion to Head Guard have been discussed.

When I read Tarot at my table, I always tell clients whether a relationship or job, you keep your Dignity. Don't let any job or person, consume you or Beat You Down. If that happens, it's time to Go. Those that are afraid to go, well sometimes, the Universe will move you out without any notice. When that happens, try to embrace the Unknown. The Universe is Telling You, It's Time to Move On. My mentor in Tarot would always say, God Can't Be That Mean. Take care of yourself, try not to let others deplete your Energy or take Your Dignity, Your Spirit. When push comes to shove and your back is against the wall, you just may be directed into the Unknown. I try to tell people, honestly, I find the Unknown better than where I had been. I firmly believe, finally standing up for herself and then letting it ALL GO, is why my daughter got the Dream Job she wanted. When you Honor Yourself, then the Universe will Honor You.